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7 Jan 2002

homo-horoscopes 2002

Fridae's resident psychic, Madam Fe Latio peers into the future and shares his wacky predictions with you.

Worried about your ruined finances, your flagging career, your cheating boyfriend or your inability to find true love? Eager to find out just what do your star signs have in store for you in the year 2002? Fridae's resident psychic, Madam Fe Latio peers into the future and shares his wacky predictions with you.

Sagittarius
Nov 21 to Dec 21

Looks like you're going places this year, hon. Expect to travel a fair bit, both around the world, and in your own world. There are going to be some hard lessons, too, but at the end you'll know who your friends are. And you'll survive - you always do, don't you? Your foot-in-mouth curse will get you into trouble, but be sincere and honest and things will work out.

One thing you must remember is to keep your randy nature under control! Too much sex is a bad thing, and you'll be offered a lot of temptation this year. Thoughts of settling down may flit in your head, but you'll probably ignore them in favour of the next romp in the sack. Just don't sulk if you don't always have your way.

You won't have to worry about money this year, so you'll have a lot more freedom to discover things. Be more generous, and you'll be repaid handsomely. But also spend some time on introspection. Do you really still know who you are? You'll be tempted to stray, but don't forget where homo's sweet home is.

Capricorn
Dec 22 to Jan 19

So, my little schemer, are all your plans coming to fruition this year? Well, most will, although don't be taken aback if some things don't quite work out as you intended. You know what they say about the best laid plans of mice and maniacs

And speaking of maniacs, ease off a bit this year! While your sexual exploits may have become legendary, you're going to pay the price for it with your health if you don't slow down. Not to worry, your health looks to be pretty good this year, but your mental health is another matter. Too much sex on the brain and all. Stop stalking and learn to enjoy life a bit. And be careful of jailbait! Legal age does vary, you know.

Learn to compromise, don't always insist on winning. That's what keeps getting you into trouble. Learn to open up more to friends and partners, let them see that you do value their company. Expect a few conflicts in life, but don't sit and dread about them.

Aquarius
Jan 20 to Feb 18

So, you followed the whole season of Survivor, and what do you have to show for it? Get out more! Live life and meet new people. You may have noticed that your circle of friends seem to shrink more each year. No, they haven't been kidnapped by aliens, it's just that they sometimes wonder if you have. This year will provide a few opportunities to open up and let your inner person shine. Don't screw up.

Focus more on your work. It's gonna be a difficult year, career-wise, and you need to get your head out of the clouds and onto the desk. Stop dreaming of the gorgeous butt sitting next to you - he's taken. I know you resent being locked up in the office all day, but hey, it pays the gym membership.
Whatever you're looking for, it's unlikely you'll find it this year, so just enjoy the ride. Speaking of which, expect to do a fair bit of travelling this year, so go buy a practical bag. I know it's not always a good thing to be the blonde among the zodiacs, but at least you have more fun, right?

Pisces
Feb 19 to March 20

It's going to be an interesting year for you, my fishy friend. Just remember, sweetie, that you'll have to stop listening to everyone else sometimes, and make up your own mind. Believe in yourself, and learn a little selfishness. The truth is, there is no easy way out, so you're just gonna have to find answers yourself.

But it's not all bad. Lots of excitement and fun are coming your way, and maybe a special someone, hmmm? Or at least a few really good marathon sex sessions. But try not to always give in, and watch the purse strings! Don't spend too much on the new darling.

Work's going to be busy, and you'll have a challenging time juggling between your career and personal life, but that's how it is when you're invaluable. Find a boyfriend with a car, or a girlfriend with a bike. It'll save you more time in the long run. And in sex, do NOT let your partner go too far. A little kink is fun. Live gerbils and gasoline shouldn't enter the bedroom.

Aries
March 21 to April 19

Honey, if you've learned anything last year, it's that your impulses get you into trouble! Do try not to let your crotch take over your cranium completely this year, would you? Channelled properly, your impulsive, aggressive nature is one of your best assets. You're an achiever, but it's critical to set the right goals (and I don't mean just for the night). Focus, dear, focus!

This is a good year to start working out again, if you've stopped, or to try a new routine. Money-wise, you're gonna be able to live the way you've always liked - expensively. But put aside a little bit, too, you might need it during the middle of the year for a special treat. Or for bail money.

Romance looks average, although some wild sex seems to be lined up for you. Not really something new is it, hmmm? Given your penchance for the umm. exotic, this should right up your alley. So to speak.

Taurus
April 20 to May 20

It looks to be a quiet year for you. No big ups and downs like the last few. Problem with that is, peace tends to make you lazy! Don't fall into a routine. Keep your life moving, do some new things, meet new people. You might have a tendency to be a little careless with your work, so pay attention! You've got good common sense. Use it.

You've got a little tendency to put on weight this year, so try to keep things in balance. Indulge if you must, but don't stint on the workouts too. Spend some time cleaning - you know that's been long overdue. That includes whatever messes you've got lurking in your personal life, too. Time for closure, honey, and moving on.

Your sex life tends to simmer, more than sizzle. Try to experiment a little, try something new. Your partner will undoubtedly enjoy it. Who knows, he or she may even stay awake longer.
Gemini
May 21 to June 20

You're a one-person Pride parade. Friends are gonna expect you to be the usual surprise that you are, or even more! Then again, it ain't exactly flattering to be seen as the group mascot. You've got to tame that restless animal inside you, and try to take things a little slower. Find something you wanna do and stick with it!

This year's gonna be another roller-coaster ride, and you need to put a little stability in your life, or you're gonna be having emotional ups and downs. Again! And that includes your finances. Learn a little moderation, and you might be tearing out fewer hairs at the end of the month. Depression may be a close companion this year so try to keep a light outlook.

But don't fret - it's gonna be a great year for sex! Whether in twos, threes, or more! And your fetish for fetishes just adds to your allure! Don't be surprised with a whirlwind romance, but don't expect it to last either. If you're already with a partner, stop trying to change who or what they are! It's driving them nuts!

Cancer
June 21 to July 22

Time to crack open your shell and explore the new year, luv. You have to move from that rut you've been in. Last year was filled with emotional ups and downs. This year isn't going to be much different if you don't do something about it. Be positive! Things ARE looking up.

Change your look. Clothes, hair, whatever - you need to refresh your self and your life. Something will happen this year, which may make you feel like withdrawing from everyone. Don't! Face things, and explore your hidden strengths. Don't neglect people and don't forget about your friends.

The financial situation looks good, but don't expect any sudden windfalls. Spend some time on introspection in the latter part of the year, but focus on your strengths - you have more than you give yourself credit for. Take a risk in love - the signs are favourable for it. If things do work out, don't be too possessive, or it may not work out the way you hope.

Leo
July 23 to Aug 22

The stars show a lot of wonderful times to be had around midyear, with a potential for real romance somewhere around August! But don't be overeager, and try not to overdo the drama. Instead, try spending a little more time with others, and be attentive to their needs. Enough with "me, me and more me"; learn to listen to other people, too.

The money situation looks good, but do try not to over-indulge. Too much pampering makes you a fat kitten. Besides, money never lasts as long as you expected. Don't gamble everything on one throw of the dice, and the same goes for your emotional assets. Learn to hold out, to leave a little for later to be discovered. Be a little more adventurous in sex, and try to focus more on your partner's needs, or you may find yourself trolling the chat channels and personals every few weeks. Assuming you don't already do that. Oh, and stop showing off, dear. People notice, they just pretend to ignore it when you overdo things.
Virgo
Aug 23 to Sep 22

Things have been a little difficult lately, but that's about to change - though a lot of it depends on you! Things may be finally starting to go your way, dear, but if you don't try to open up a bit, opportunity may knock on deaf ears. Learn to take a more active role in things. Circumstances may arise that call on you to lead sometime this year, so take the reins in your well-manicured hands and show your stuff!

Your career is looking good, so it's time to pay some attention to your personal life. People around you are going to feel a little neglected this year, so shower them with attention. Spend some of that hard earned cash on them, and on yourself - you deserve it. And spend more time working out, you've been stinging on the gym, and it's beginning to show.

Don't let your voyeuristic tendencies get the better of you. Cut down on the porn collection, it's bad for your elbow. Existing relationships are going to get even more rocky if you don't give more commitment to them. A new relationship may develop, but don't be too aloof. Remember, if you want to be chased, drop some bait.

Libra
Sep 23 to Oct 22

So, did we learn anything this year after the year-end credit check? I have 3 words for you: LAY OFF THE PLASTIC! Ok, that's 4 words, but isn't that your philosophy when it comes to life? A little bit more can't hurt? Well, you've pampered yourself silly last year, and those diamonds may be gorgeous (yes, they're real!), but you'll need to take it easy on the spending this year if you don't want to be a regular at your nearest pawnshop.

Your innate sense of balance is going to be tested this year, but your strong personality and charisma will win you through. Just remember that there are some fights not worth winning, and there are some that just can't be settled. Learn to compromise more. You'll need it.

Whew! Sex is gonna be varied and plentiful this year (do send us details, hmmm), but if you're planning to finally settle on The One, you're gonna have to make up your mind. Remember, foreplay is the appetiser, not the steak. Don't overdo it before you get to the main course.

Scorpio
Oct 23 to Nov 20

Choices, choices, choices. People have been clamouring for your attention and charm, and that's going to continue till next year. Keep them guessing, dear, and they'll keep coming back. Let your sensuality come to the fore. Just remember to always keep that temper in check, and that sharp tongue under rein.

Things are going to be in a bit of flux this year, so stay on your toes. Not that you really need any warning, luv. You're rarely caught with your pants down, unless it was intentional. A secret of yours may be exposed this year, but just take it in stride.

Sex is on the upswing this year, and you'll have a lot of opportunity to indulge your kinks. Partners are going to be more plentiful than last year, so go and enjoy the bounty! But you're going to find yourself wanting to spend a lot more time at home, so do force yourself to be seen. It's such a waste of that magnetism when all you're doing is attracting dust.

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