Fridae

æ: Can you tell us more about "Queer Radio" & "Dykes on Mykes" and how it started?

john: "Queer Radio" and "Dykes on Mykes" are the current names for the gay and lesbian support programs which have been presented on community radio 4ZZZ fm102.1 in Brisbane since 1978. The station has the longest run of continuous support for our community in Australian radio, but the names have changed and night of the week have varied. The women's and men's shows alternate each week, giving each show a full 2 hours to present a range of issues, guests, music and news - with a laid back and personal style. Our broadcast range covers most of coastal southeast Queensland.

æ: What are its aims?

john: We aim to be totally honest and open about our own sexuality and to be supportive and accepting of others in doing the same. Listeners know that we take them seriously and that we are aware of the issues they may be dealing with. We share our both joys and our concerns, but make it clear that we accept ourselves and that we are determined to enjoy life.

We encourage community activism and participation as an excellent way of developing both self-esteem and supportive networks and we work closely with many community groups such as the Brisbane Lesbian and Gay Pride Collective and the Queensland AIDS Council.

"Queer Radio" particularly promotes music produced by openly gay artists from around the world. Their music is an empowering and immeasurably valuable resource, and they deserve to be supported by LGBT consumers. Too many people think that the "dull soul-less dance music" they hear at the clubs is "gay music", when in fact it says nothing to them about their lives. Musicians such as Chinese-Hawaiian cabaret artist Matt Yee put their whole heart and soul out there for you to embrace and share.

æ: How has "Queer Radio" & "Dykes on Mykes" affected the lesbian community in Queensland?

john: "Dykes on Mykes" concentrates on women's issues pretty much exclusively, and in our very male-centric society, that's important. About 8 years ago the separate women's show was established in recognition of the fact that there are markedly different issues being dealt with by "gay" women, and that a space was needed where the participants could present those aspects in a mutually supportive environment and without having to compromise or to justify themselves.

"Dykes on Mykes" strongly supports women in theatre, and also through involvement in the Pride Collective. They are empowered, honest and truly happy women.

John's Community

æ: Have you ever encountered prejudice because of your gender/sexuality? How did you deal with it?

john: I have been fortunate to have never been assualted, but I was threatened once with attack in Brisbane's Fortitude Valley, when I was waiting outside a McDonald's, near the gay pub "The Wickham" for my boyfriend:

A couple of drunk, and very unattractive yobbos (rednecks) were abusing every man who walked past them, calling them "faggot", "cocksucker" and so on.

When it was obvious that they weren't moving on, I said to them "Look, if you don't like faggots, you should be with your mates up at Caxton Street".

One of them leaned close and said "Why? Are you a faggot?"

"Yes"

"And you suck cocks, do you?"

"Yes.... that's what faggots do." They were temporarily speechless.

My boyfriend and I then went down toward the pub.

It took the yobbos a few minutes to decide that I deserved to be thumped, and came after us - but the Wickham Hotel's security quickly stepped in to protect us.

On another occasion, I was cycling home one night and as I turned in to my home street, a drunk young man on the corner called out "Nice Bike!�.Faggot!!".

I quickly called back "Thanks - right on both counts!". He practically choked in calling for me to come back so that he could beat the shit out of me. But it was too late, I was well away with a big smile on my face.

æ: What do you think we need most in Asia's gay and lesbian community?

john: Mutual acceptance of cultural, racial, sexual and gender identity in others. Too often gay men or lesbians see the acceptance of their own niche group as being important, and they are quite nonchalant about being racist, sexist or intolerant of trannies.

æ: What advice would you give to someone who is trying to come to terms with his or her sexuality?

john: Seek peer support through your school or university. Take advice from counseling services you can trust. Access the internet for supportive websites and supportive information. Find out if there are gay and lesbian radio shows that you can listen to. Join a local gay and lesbian community group in which you have a shared interest, whether that may be in sports or community support. Read local gay & lesbian community papers and magazines. Read a range of gay and lesbian books, especially non-fiction. Listen to music by openly gay artists.

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About John

æ: When did you realise you were gay? What was the process like?

I can remember enjoying mutual masturbation with boys when I was 8, and always feeling a strong attraction to some of the boys in high school (though I did not fool around with any then). I dated a few girls in my late teens and early twenties, because it was easy and they were keen. My heart was never in it, and the occasional sexual encounters I had with men gave me everything I could have hoped for from sex. About 8 years ago I decided I wanted to be totally honest and open about who I felt attracted to.

æ: Are you out to family and friends? If yes, could you tell us something about it? Is it an important factor in your life?

john: I always had one inspiring friend from high school who was a role model gay activist, and many other friends who were openly gay positive - so coming out was easy with my friends. It was also readily accepted by my family, though actually coming out to them was nerve wracking nonetheless. Once the adrenaline had faded, I knew everything was fine and the only way was up from there.

æ: Do you believe in monogamous or open relationships? Are you in one?

john: I am in a casual mutually consenting non-monogamous relationship, but it is not necessarily a permanent one. It has its advantages in giving freedom to associate with others, and little excuse for jealousy - but I would love to be in a committed monogamous relationship with someone I both trust and respect. A monogamous relationship gives you a stronger sense of security and shared responsibility.

æ: What kind of underwear person are you?

john: Holeproof Underdaks

æ: What's your favourite CD?

john: "Velvet Donkey" by Ivor Cutler (1975 Virgin Records). I've fantasised that my ideal husband will also find that this wonderful Scottish poet, singer and musician is both very funny and brilliantly insightful. Spike Milligan dedicated his book "Unspun Socks" to Ivor saying " To Ivor Cutler who, but for the ignorance of the general public, would be a rich man".

æ: What kind of pet do you have? Why?

john: I have two dogs (an Australian terrier and a silky terrier cross). Dogs are non-judgemental, totally honest and devotedly loving creatures with a great sense of the joy of life.

Apr�s Interview

æ: Tell us something about your first sexual experience?

john: With a good friend who really knew what he wanted to do. I didn't have any information on how to do sex safely or comfortably, so it was not as glamorous an experience as it should have been. At least it was guilt free, mutually respectful and satisfying.

æ: What is your favourite fantasy?

john: Finding a cyclist in need of help when I'm out riding one day and quickly finding that I have just the tool he really needed.

æ: What is your kinkiest experience?

john: Doing full-bore sex in my father's car parked on a hill overlooking my boyfriend's parents' house.

æ: Which is sexier, mind or meat?

john: A kind, honest and communicative man with reasoned opinions will win for me over any amount of mindless muscle.