Vietnam's move to legislate marriage equality is a ruse to make it look "cool" and promote its new face of modernity for the government has failed to educate the nation's conservative base that recognizes same sex relations as taboo, says a Vietnamese gay activist.
“Gay marriage is a battle that requires time (and) built upon the acceptance, tolerance, and understanding of the straight society…It appears Vietnam is jumping too far ahead without paving the way in which gay marriage can be celebrated,” said Valentine Vu writing in an editorial for tuoitrenews.vn.
“Vietnamese people are not ready for it because the majority of the population still holds prejudice against homosexuality being a disease, in fear of it being contagious, and afraid of losing face value if a friend/family member is gay,” he pointed out.
Although both male and female same-sex relations is legal and is believed to never have been criminalized in Vietnamese history, society is still heavily prejudiced against the LGBT.
Vietnamese lawmakers say the country is being progressive as it has scrapped fines against marriage between same-sex couples even though the proposed Family and Marriage Bill has not officially been passed. The National Assembly is likely to vote on the issue later in 2014.
Even if the marriage equality bill were passed, more disparities between the people would happen resulting in further isolation of gay families if gay marriage is recognized without any foundation to properly support it, Vu added.
This is because the “the nation’s conservative base still recognizes homosexuality as a taboo act and not as a personal identity,” said the openly gay Vietnamese-Canadian fashion design lecturer and program manager at a design and art center in Ho Chi Minh City.
Some have argued that people who are against gay marriage are uneducated. “It is not fair to make such an assumption when the government, educational system, culture, and even gays don’t take the time to teach and to represent a positive image of homosexuality,” he said.
“What this country needs is the new face of homosexuality, the courage for gays to come out, the celebration of a positive gay culture, and the introduction of gay acknowledgement in the educational system,” said Vu who grew-up in Canada.
To be a positive gay image is a daily struggle, he said. “In public, due to the way I dress, it automatically points out my sexual orientation and that will raise looks, pointed fingers, snickering, and sometimes even vocalized opinions.”
Nonetheless, Vu is lucky he is a teacher because it enables him “to present and influence a positive representation of homosexuality” in front of college-age students.
Vietnam has been governed by a Communist government partly since independence from the colonial French in 1954 and fully since 1975 but has since remained impoverished and politically isolated.
In 1986, the government initiated a series of reforms to begin Vietnam’s path toward integration into the international community.
“Gay marriage is a battle that requires time (and) built upon the acceptance, tolerance, and understanding of the straight society…It appears Vietnam is jumping too far ahead without paving the way in which gay marriage can be celebrated,” said Valentine Vu writing in an editorial for tuoitrenews.vn.
“Vietnamese people are not ready for it because the majority of the population still holds prejudice against homosexuality being a disease, in fear of it being contagious, and afraid of losing face value if a friend/family member is gay,” he pointed out.
Although both male and female same-sex relations is legal and is believed to never have been criminalized in Vietnamese history, society is still heavily prejudiced against the LGBT.
Vietnamese lawmakers say the country is being progressive as it has scrapped fines against marriage between same-sex couples even though the proposed Family and Marriage Bill has not officially been passed. The National Assembly is likely to vote on the issue later in 2014.
Even if the marriage equality bill were passed, more disparities between the people would happen resulting in further isolation of gay families if gay marriage is recognized without any foundation to properly support it, Vu added.
This is because the “the nation’s conservative base still recognizes homosexuality as a taboo act and not as a personal identity,” said the openly gay Vietnamese-Canadian fashion design lecturer and program manager at a design and art center in Ho Chi Minh City.
Some have argued that people who are against gay marriage are uneducated. “It is not fair to make such an assumption when the government, educational system, culture, and even gays don’t take the time to teach and to represent a positive image of homosexuality,” he said.
“What this country needs is the new face of homosexuality, the courage for gays to come out, the celebration of a positive gay culture, and the introduction of gay acknowledgement in the educational system,” said Vu who grew-up in Canada.
To be a positive gay image is a daily struggle, he said. “In public, due to the way I dress, it automatically points out my sexual orientation and that will raise looks, pointed fingers, snickering, and sometimes even vocalized opinions.”
Nonetheless, Vu is lucky he is a teacher because it enables him “to present and influence a positive representation of homosexuality” in front of college-age students.
Vietnam has been governed by a Communist government partly since independence from the colonial French in 1954 and fully since 1975 but has since remained impoverished and politically isolated.
In 1986, the government initiated a series of reforms to begin Vietnam’s path toward integration into the international community.
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Reader's Comments
Too much negativity is... negative.
I have been to Vietnam many times. The people are warm
and friendly but they do have a conservative element. The
gay upward mobile class should organize and move into
sections of the larger cites. This would create a political gay
voice in city government. It will take time and money but
they just need to keep on trying. If they pass he law it's
one less hurdle to overcome.
Thank you Fridae for re-posting my article that I've written last year in 2013 when the whole country of Vietnam was excited, anticipated, and even throwing rocks at the possibility of equal marriage. After written this article I had as much cheers as well as jeers coming from all over the board (including the LGBT community). They say that I was being negative and why not accept or at least be happy for such opportunity. Yet few took the time to actually read the article from top to bottom ^.^ and totally missed my main point.
My main argument is that there is no such thing as equal marriage in Vietnam let alone gay marriage. When the cultural difference between male and female (superior vs. inferior) is still present throughout the country, being gay is inferior to even being a woman. I have lived here for 6 years and I felt no change in gender equality let alone gender identity. So which should come first? gender identity where one take pride and loving oneself for who they are, or marriage equality when the average woman is still on the street breaking her back while her husband is drinking day in and out? Maybe it is only in parts of the country that is like that and you don't see it in the big city; but those "parts" are the majority of the people.
Sure you can take the bull by the horn and have whatever the law is throwing into the public, but without gay pride, and pride as human beings, it seems "gay marriage" will just be another step that will lead to "gay divorce". So what are we fighting for? The right to love or the right to be recognized by the law? If it is the right to love, haven't we been doing it for so long and so beautifully? Being gay is more than just a legal marriage paper, just keep on loving and keep on going despite what the law said...
But honestly, deep down, I truly hope that Vietnam does pass the law. But so far, there is no change even until now. Human rights first before gay rights for such country like my mother's country. I'm glad that Vietnam does not physically persecute gays legally; and generally most people are sympathetic, took pity towards gays as long that homosexuality is not in their family.
Last year, shortly after this article is written, a lot of young gays attacked me verbally calling me a traitor to the LGBT community. Then shortly after, a student of mine and her girlfriend came out to their family. The girlfriend's father beat the his own daughter out of frustration and shame until she was hospitalize. They ended their relationship now, and all that is left are pain, longing, regret as one of the girl will get married to a man. So, marriage is not just between 2 person, it is between both families, the community, and the neighbourhood, and Asian families is one messy relationship chart with the importance still focus on face value. As Asian in general were never taught to celebrate their individuality, but to always think and act as a tight knit unit.
But I still have hope that one day the world will change, but for now, can we love ourselves a little longer...Valentine Vu
There is an assertion in the article that the writer is subject to sniggers, jeers etc...but that seems to be about his attire.... attire which he somehow attributes to being "gay". He stereotypes himself.
I am gay, I do not wear outlandish or cutting-edge apparel and I enjoy motor sports and "masculine" things...and I am very out.
Unfortunately I see that this writer has an internalized bias, but I also see that the very important first steps to "equality" have been taken in law. And after being sooooo long in arriving one cannot expect to "feel" an instant change.
It takes time...and decriminalization is a HUGE step for which you should feel very grateful.
There is an assertion in the article that the writer is subject to sniggers, jeers etc...but that seems to be about his attire.... attire which he somehow attributes to being "gay". He stereotypes himself.
I am gay, I do not wear outlandish or cutting-edge apparel and I enjoy motor sports and "masculine" things...and I am very out.
Unfortunately I see that this writer has an internalized bias, but I also see that the very important first steps to "equality" have been taken in law. And after being sooooo long in arriving one cannot expect to "feel" an instant change.
It takes time...and decriminalization is a HUGE step for which you should feel very grateful.
I hope Vietnamese society gets more tolerant in the whole and global human rights are respected (like in other societies of Asia and other parts of the world). It may not be possible without a fundamental change in the political system.
Your second post leans toward human right issue that we are desperately needing to change in vietnam. For sure, i agree with you on this, that is the truth of matter. US, as vietnamese living in western countries, what can we do instead of posting our own opinions regarding issues without even THINKING of what else we can contribute to change such issues in vietnam. We can have opinions, yet but opionions without real actions will only words with no meaning to it.
Iam glad you brough this up, because it has been a thought of mine as well.
So that Fake God replacing True God.
- you see problems/discrimination to LGBT in Asia-Africa Countries, Even in USA ( stonewall case) that made many Gay run away by violence.
Gay Mariage in USA was New ( not in the past)
-Ofcourse it is against God that created Gay/LGBT
because God did not created Hollybook.
- Even Anti-gay written in their Hollybook as I often Heard Religion Leader Preaching.
But Here we can see why? It is because they are afraid of going to Heaven that They created by theirselves. or may be they knew that Heaven they created by their imagination was fake.
- I do not know exactly if Vietnam society hate Gay, because I only see by myself and you had seen by yourselves in your countries respectively, How they discriminate gay/LGBT for years.
- you also should suspicious why some people spreading Religions because If Religion is true love and True Heaven, Then none would spread Religions and None Preach Religions.
1. woman and man were no marriage at past, they need years to make Legal marriage by making Reasons and you must know what Reasons.
2. It is the same thing with LGBT, If you just asking for marriage because you want, then there will be no marriage.
3. You must know what the impact of LGBT marriage to others?
4. You Must also know the character of Law Makers, They will not make Law if you do not help them to make Law.
5. you also must know History How The Law Maker Hold Law? because There were existing Law both written or unwritten, they did not make Law because no capabilities. no ability of wisdom because there is no wisdom school.
Wisdom can not be thought. It mean that The wisdom today is not Wisdom for tomorrow. Wisdom is pure Talents.
There is no Wisdom school but Wisdom Registration and Wisdom Operation School...Wisdom can not be thought by Teacher.
6. Sometimes Law Made by Riots, Mean that If you want Law Maker Make Law then Just Make Riots. ( Riots can be regarded as Peace by some people)
But it is depend on who are stronger.
you may see many Riots, Hate, Libel, Terror at everywhere in The world.
7. Law is about Power or solution, it is not about Love ( for countries who have no Love). so you must understand what kind of country you are in and what Kind of people that are Law Maker.
8. But if UNO really want to create peace, then there should be many countries having own religions respectively, having own prophets, having own myth, having own hollybook. and there must be Countries without Religion.
If you had been in School, perhaps you will learn on how to evaluate items as measurements.
If every country having the same religion than you will not find the truth but fake and complexity problems. you will not see true light as well.
Or do they Really have Plan for making Riots?
we see that none countries have no Plan.
This planned problems are extraordinary crime.
and you also know what is punishment for this Plan.
You may search to every Ministry or every government body. what their plan, long plans?
or Their crime plan are secret? what syndicate is this?
9. Do you think the way of Noah prophet to wipe out Human by Flood was correct ? that was darkness in Human life, i think.
And you know that no punishment for them. what ever they made. it is Sinful.
Being a secular country, I am confident the Vietnamese society will evolve positively in its attitude towards LGBT, especially once the marriage equality law is passed.
Being a secular country, I am confident the Vietnamese society will evolve positively in its attitude towards LGBT, especially once the marriage equality law is passed.
Being a secular country, I am confident the Vietnamese society will evolve positively in its attitude towards LGBT, especially once the marriage equality law is passed.
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