Fridae

Produced and launched on Wednesday by Malaysiakini, an independent news online news portal in Malaysia, the 14-minute video features Yong Wei CHONG Gabrielle, who recounts her suicide attempt a year ago while she was a student in Massachusetts, United States.

"Ever since I’ve come out, I’ve had tremendous support from tons of people... including many. many Malay Muslims, Catholics and Christians. Malaysian people are much more accommodating, accepting, and tolerant than we think… So have a little bit of faith in Malaysian society. I don’t think we give ourselves credit enough for that. Things will get better for LGBT people but I think there's a more important message that... things might get better or things might get worse because that is how life works. But it's important to note that regardless of the outcome that even if it does get worse, just hang in there anyway and make someone else’s life better." - Gabrielle Yong, 21

Her suicide attempt however was not due to homophobic abuse. Prior to leaving Malaysia in 2009, Chong was active in the LGBT community in Malaysia having founded Tiltedworld.org, an online Malaysian LGBT project, in 2008. In the same year, she won the first prize at a public speaking competition organised by the Malaysian Bar Council for her speech calling for the protection of gay rights in Malaysia. [The full text of her speech can be found here.] She had also participated in the National Equality March to Washington DC in 2009.

Describing herself as being from a “lower-middle class, conservative Chinese background, and terribly shy and reserved in real life” in an email interview with Fridae, Chong said her suicide attempt was in large part due to her difficulty in adapting to life in Massachusetts where she attends college after having won a scholarship worth US$250,000.

“It didn't have anything to do with homophobic abuse. I clarified this in the (45-minute long) interview but it was taken out due to time constraints.”

She added: “Nevertheless, I thought it'd still be relevant to talk about how I coped with the aftermath, given that many youths (LGBT or not) will experience suicidal anxiety at some point in their young lives.

“The main message I wanted to deliver isn't explained until the very last 60 seconds of the video – that is, whether it gets better or not, you should still hang in there and fight the good fight (whatever you make your life's cause to be).”

While she recognises the tremendous impact of the "It Gets Better" campaign, which has attracted participation from celebrities to politicians including US President Barack Obama, she says it's also "important to recognise that the experiences of LGBT people are as varied as anyone else's".

"As humans, we're very adept at casting prejudice and abuse on our brethren, if not on the basis of race, class... etc (aspects other than sexuality). On the other hand, you have plenty of LGBT folks who grew up in relatively good social and emotional health. Personally, I've always been bullied as an adolescent for a myriad of reasons (I was terribly awkward, and few of my peers could understand my ideas), but never for my sexuality. In that sense, there's a need to avoid boxing LGBT youths in the same mold.

Chong, who is originally from Ipoh (Perak), continued: "Secondly, I think it's important to move beyond hope (as radical as that sounds). There's the pragmatic factor: given the volatile socio-political situation (especially in Malaysia's case), no one can guarantee that things are going to really get better in terms of legislative progress, cultural liberalisation etc. And then there's the idealistic factor: all the major civil rights movements (the Catholic Worker Movement, the African-American Civil Rights Movement, the struggle against apartheid, etc) weren't sustained on hope; they were sustained on principle – the belief that you struggle for something because you know it to be right, regardless of whether the situation turns for the worse or better (and all the people in these movements suffered for years and years before things actually got better). For some, there's an inherent irony in the It Gets Better campaign – things could actually get worse, not better, for some people if they ever participate in the video campaign because they risk outing themselves to hostile quarters in their social network.

"It's good to be optimistic (and like I said in the video, I've much faith in Malaysian people in spite of the daily supply of disillusioning news), but you don't fight your daily battles because you actually believe that your life is going to be much better - that kids will stop giving you a hard time, relatives will start welcoming you with open arms, the media will become more inclusive, politicians will stop making jackass remarks and – tomorrow. Rather, you fight your daily battles because you will it to be – you've got dreams to realise, people to love, magic to create – for better or for worse. Hope is great, but moral courage is supreme."

Yong says she is likely to retain the same scholarship and plans to return to her college in January 2011 after a one-year break in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia.

Producers of the video Shufiyan Shukur and Indrani Kopal say their project is ongoing and are seeking subjects who are willing to share their stories. Interested individuals can contact the producers at indra@malaysiakini.com.

Seksualiti Merdeka is also calling for participants for its own "It Gets Better" video campaign to be done in Malay, Mandarin, Tamil & English; interested parties can email Pang Khee Teik at worldwithoutpangs@gmail.com.