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24 Jan 2013

Elderly gay couple come out in karaoke video on Chinese social network

An elderly couple in Beijing, China who came out as gay and announced their upcoming marriage on Weibo, the popular Chinese microblogging social network, has attracted thousands of comments and gained over 5,000 fans in days.


An elderly gay couple in China who recently came out on Weibo, the Chinese equivalent of Twitter, found themselves becoming a controversial topic on the social network, reports Hong Kong’s Southern Chinese Morning Post.

The men, one who appears to be in his 50s and the other probably in his 60s, say there were inspired by Hong Kong’s “Big Love” gay rights campaign launched by openly gay Hong Kong singers Anthony Wong, and Denise Ho this month. Since first posting about their relationship on Jan 18, the couple, who did not reveal their names, now has more than 5,000 fans.

 “Two old men’s love” (两个老头的爱情) Weibo page

On their profile page named “Two old men’s love” (两个老头的爱情), they said that they are deeply in love and plan to marry this month and asked their online friends for their blessings.

“Please give us your well-wishes, there’s no use objecting even if you want to,” read the scrolling message on a video recording of the pair singing Yue Liang Dai Biao Wo De Xin (The moon represents my heart), a classic love song by Taiwanese songstress Teresa Teng.

In the video, they kissed passionately, stroked each others’ faces and bantered. “I really love you, little darling,” said one and the other quipped, “Old darling, old darling.”

According to the newspaper report, the retired and divorced history teacher met his partner – a water delivery worker – when the latter was making a delivery.

In another video posted three days later, the pair addressed Weibo users who opposed their relationship and urged them to not be close-minded. The more outspoken of the two shared how they met and he came to love and care for his partner who is a migrant worker.

Their photos and posts have drawn thousands of comments some which were supportive and while others were not so.

“We won’t part till we die,” the Post quoted the couple as saying on Weibo. “We will strive to be together no matter how hard and painful it is.”

The retired teacher added that he become estranged from his own child after he came out.

“Being together has been tough,” he said. “Few people support us, except a few of our older friends.”

Same-sex marriage or civil unions are not recognised in China although a number of same-sex couples have held wedding banquets that were covered by the mainstream media.

Beijing court recommends marriages with gay spouses can be annulled

In a report released last week, the First Intermediate People's Court of Beijing recommended that the state allows those who discover their spouses to be gay avoid the messiness of divorce by filing for an annulment instead, according to the state-run Xinhua news agency.

After winning an annulment, the person who filed the request would be legally listed as “single” instead of “divorced.”

The report said the number of such cases has been increasing. Current marriage law does not provide an "out" for such marriages and many of the wives view divorce unfavourably.

China has at least 10 million "gay wives," according to prominent sexologist Zhang Beichuan, adding that nearly 90 percent of gay men are already married to or will eventually marry heterosexual women, as same-sex marriage is banned in the country.

Reader's Comments

1. 2013-01-24 19:23
Wang Fei! So romantic. :)
Comment #2 was deleted by its author on 2013-02-02 13:21
3. 2013-01-24 22:24
How stupid to be describing a man in his 50's as "elderly" - hope it happens to the copywriter.....
4. 2013-01-24 23:06
Heart warming and encouraging story. My best wishes to this lovely couple. It gives me encouragement that there is LTR in gay life.
5. 2013-01-24 23:23
i support them
6. 2013-01-25 00:14
7. 2013-01-25 03:05
That is so wonderful. I am sure many would love to be them. So in love for so long. I am in the ballpark of that age group and I have no problem with terms of older or elderly. It's is only a title and a name. Who cares.

If you are in love there are no ages...

Remember it is not the years in your life that count, but the "life in" your years that does.

Best wishes to them.
8. 2013-01-25 05:23
9. 2013-01-25 06:52
Wow. Like all readers before me, I feel warm and respect for this couple. I wish the very best for the love they share.
10. 2013-01-25 07:16
I don't understand chinese though 2nd video and the question was cute.
11. 2013-01-25 07:32
Good on them, lets hope this will bring more people out into the open and show the world we do exist and we do love others.
12. 2013-01-25 08:07
Bravo! 加油!
13. 2013-01-25 08:26
It is so exciting to hear such wonderful news! I am so happy for them. Obviously, it does not matter about how others feel, because the feeling is yours, and this happy couple have proven that. WOW! Fridae, you have made my day a very happy one. I wish this couple to have many bountiful blessings and a very long and loving prosperous life.
14. 2013-01-25 09:16
Was the author of this otherwise rather inspirational story 11 years old? "Elderly" when the couple are in their 50s and 60s! Good luck to them and their courage and conviction but please Fridae have some perspective about which age group is actually "elderly" - I would hazard a guess and say 70 plus
15. 2013-01-25 10:08
omg how good for this couple to stand up as being human and
by the way gay. com'on China you can catch up with the U.S.A.,
with legalizing civil union or gay marriage etc.etc. because we
are moving a slow pace but moving. now, about this use of
the word "Elderly". dear mr author i am 66yrs and in much
better shape(mentally, physically and sizewise)than people
i worked with at AAL in there 20's and 30's. elderly to me
is 82yrs and older. hello.......
16. 2013-01-25 11:07
Yes, i tough same relationship never last. in this case .. yet so wonderful to dream have a partner for a long time relationship..
17. 2013-01-25 12:12
so cute :)
18. 2013-01-25 15:47
Yes!! We're getting there...
19. 2013-01-25 15:55
as an older man that thought I would be like these two tell my lover passed away, I am so touched you young men have no idea how it feels sorry but you dont, but lets hope you will
20. 2013-01-25 18:54
21. 2013-01-26 06:55
22. 2013-01-26 07:10
Brave and Courage are the two words that come to my mind. It is extremely difficult to be JUST SIMPLY HONEST in a homophobic environment, let alone living in such a country. A Universal problem for most asian, I am sad to say.
I can now envisage the problems and the looks and stares which they are getting from their neighbour, friends, colleagues, etc. It is not easy and it may even be a test for their love.
I hope they pull through and I extend my very hearty CONGRATULATIONS and that they will live through it all and be triumphant.
They have given another meaningful boost to our struggle for recognition and tolerance.
23. 2013-01-26 10:45
Congratulations, I'm very happy for you both to be in such a loving relationship at this stage of your life. Not only are you standing up for Gay rights you are also standing up for others in similar stages of life by demonstrating that life doesn't stop once you reach a perceived age eg 50
24. 2013-01-26 10:57
Like President Obama said during his inauguration speech, "if you believe we are created equal is not their love equal"?
I wish them more of the happiness they have found in each others arms during their lives.
Comment #25 was deleted by its author on 2013-02-02 13:21
26. 2013-01-26 13:49
Life is what you create regardless whatever rules or cultures ...This relationship surely makes us believed there is no discrimination when it comes to LOVE......
27. 2013-01-26 14:41
No 25: ""Elderly" connotes helpless, hopeless, loveless, immobile, ancient, irrelevant, burnt-out, shut-in, near death."

Oh please. Elderly just means above 60 years or so as defined by the World Health Organization. In Chinese culture, there's no shame in being "elderly" and they are to be respected. In fact the men refer to themselves as "old" in their Weibo profile name. Whatever negative perceptions anyone has of being elderly or old, please get over it.
28. 2013-01-26 15:59
SEE.....we are EVERYWHERE :-)
29. 2013-01-26 18:14
#27: We come from different continents, countries, cultures, backgrounds, and moments in time where words in the English language sometimes carry different connotations, power, inuendo and meaning.

I do agree that 'age' and its various synonyms, permutations and connotations is something we can (and 'should') be able to 'get over'.

30. 2013-01-26 21:30
These two men touched my heart.

Love is ageless. It's another step toward tolerance.
31. 2013-01-27 02:02
Love it, but its China. I hope they don't get shipped off to the gulag.
32. 2013-01-27 11:45
Very lovely. It is true then that love conquers all. :-)
33. 2013-01-27 14:31
Yes yes yes.... Congratulations, 祝賀你們快樂。

Btw, Canada's largest province Ontario just a few hours go elected their first female Premier(e) who is also openly gay!!!

Let's build on hope a piece t a time n support one another in our challenging journey towards equality and just society.

Let's share more positive news of our GLBT community.
34. 2013-01-27 14:31
Yes yes yes.... Congratulations, 祝賀你們快樂。

Btw, Canada's largest province Ontario just a few hours go elected their first female Premier(e) who is also openly gay!!!

Let's build on hope a piece t a time n support one another in our challenging journey towards equality and just society.

Let's share more positive news of our GLBT community.
35. 2013-01-28 01:21
The key is they love each other. Gender / age is irrelevant.

All the good blessing to them and those who find the love ones. (Y)
36. 2013-01-28 02:56
37. 2013-01-28 18:29
@29: "We come from different continents, countries, cultures, backgrounds, and moments in time where words in the English language sometimes carry different connotations, power, inuendo and meaning."

This may be true, but only because other countries, cultures and backgrounds do not know how to use the English language properly.
38. 2013-02-01 20:20
no 37
Is that why you have no picture and no information . Thruthful to what or to whom?
39. 2013-02-02 22:54
Wish you luck and happiness together. A blessed marriage!
40. 2013-07-24 08:53
Why couldn't the haters see that this is Love?

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