Fridae

Whenever Ms Scary's butch partner accuses her of behaving like a diva, Ms Scary would always refer her to her idol Ms J Lo who once booked seven limousines to ferry her 640 metres up the street for a lunch appointment and whose entourage once ran up to 100 people during a 2002 appearance for Top Of The Pops.

In between generating gossip for her diva antics, launching clothing line Sweetface and perfume Miami Glow, and marrying Latin pop skeleton Marc Anthony, the Bronx-bred "singer-actress" (I'm using the term loosely here) has recently released her fourth and latest album Rebirth where she rolls around in sand inside the CD sleeve and "sings" about her "catwalk stride" and "golden-brown thighs."

Despite big name collaborations with big names like Rodney Jerkins, Timbaland, Usher, Big Boi and Fabolous, most of the twelve tracks in Rebirth rehash the tired formula of the former fly-girl's previous albums - minus the chart potential - and offer a bland blend of R & B, funk and pop as well as an excruciating ballad ["(Can't Believe) This Is Me"].

Except for the first single "Get Right" (written by Rich Harrison who also wrote Beyonce's "Crazy In Love") with its infectious saxophone hooks, and the erotic strip tease song "Step Into My World" with its come hither lyrics ["I need ya to (kiss on me)/Feel your body (next to me)"], Rebirth is a half-baked turkey of an album that deserves a place on the big-bottomed Latina's shelf of other turkeys which includes "Jersey Girl" and "Gigli."

Scary's Selected Spins: "Get Right" and "Step Into My World."