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26 Apr 2005

Mariah Carey: The Emancipation Of Mimi

Fridae's Ms Mariah Scary pens a letter to her alter ego, Mariah "Mimi" Carey, and congratulates her on the release of her new album which debuted at No. 1 on the Billboard 200 albums chart.

Artist: Mariah Carey

Released: 2005

Dearest Mimi,

Mimi is Mariah Carey's fifth No. 1 album on the Billboard 200. Her self-titled debut spent 11 weeks on top in 1991. Two years later, her Music Box CD had an eight-week reign. In 1995, Daydream ruled for six weeks. Adding in the one week Butterfly spent at No. 1, this is Carey's 27th week on top of the album chart.
Congratulations on the release of your latest studio album The Emancipation of Mimi! Ms Scary thinks that you have never looked better (in fact, you look just like a golden Beyonce on your CD cover - chunky thighs and all!) and that your fashion sense has never been keener (just check out that bold statement of posing nude under that pleated shower curtain!)

Not only that, Ms Scary thinks that you have finally done justice to The Voice in all its five octave glory and returned to being the vocal scaling First Lady of Pop who once ruled the airwaves with her iron lungs in the 1990s! Any music fan would surely concur with yours truly once he or she takes a listen to tracks like "Circles" and "I Wish I Knew" where you trilled away at frequencies deadly to navigating bats and aspiring Idol contestants.

In my opinion, whether you are warbling your heart out on classic ballads such as "Fly Like A Bird" and "Mine Again" or grooving to slick urban dance ditties such as "It's Like That," "Get Your Number" and "To The Floor," you sound absolutely divine on all 14 tracks! (Now remember to thank your assembled army of A-list collaborators including Nelly, Jermaine Dupri, Snoop Dogg, Kanye West, Pharrell Williams and Twista).

With The Emancipation of Mimi, Ms Scary daresay that you have finally succeeded in resuscitating your fledging pop career and shown the pop world that nothing can keep a true diva down for long - not even the release of the universally derided Glitter, your unceremonious boot from Virgin Records and your much publicised public breakdowns!

Welcome back Mimi.

From
Ms Mariah Scary
Your Number One Fan who doesn't "do" stairs too.

Scary's Selected Spins: "It's Like That," "Fly Like A Bird," "Get Your Number," "Say Something," "To The Floor," "Circles," "One And Only," "Shake It Off" and "Mine Again."

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