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27 Feb 2004

fighting the good fight

Fridae's new political columnist, Paul Tan, highlights the importance for the GLBT community to be politically active.

Silenced by a cautious media and with the lack of any 'activist' judges, Singaporeans - and the GLBT community - are denied an opportunity to assess its standards of public and private morality and to resolve such issues for themselves. Fridae's new political columnist, Paul Tan, highlights the importance for the GLBT community to be politically active.

There is nothing conservative about denying homosexuals, transsexuals and transvestites equal benefits and equal protection of the law. And there is nothing liberal in advocating that we receive the same privileges as any other normal human being in society. It is about recognising that the state's legitimacy derives from its people, that homosexuals are people, and that what we do in private, or as an assertion of our conscientious beliefs, are not subject to majoritarian bully.

But of course it is much easier to stick a label - "liberals", "left-winger", "special interest", "unnatural", " them" - on the GLBT community because that means you don't have to look at the substantive merits of our claim for the precise reason that you cannot deal with them, or you won't.

So it was totally expected that when People Like Us (PLU) in late January wrote to Singapore's Members of Parliament urging them to consider dropping the ban against oral sex between consenting homosexual adults (nothing even very extreme), the immediate response was, "Please, respect our space." No, respect our space.

The fact is, that despite Deputy Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong's protestations at the Harvard Club of Singapore Anniversary Dinner, which I attended, that the government will "stop being all things to all people" and allow a civil society to flourish, the signs are that this is more talk than action. After all, if part of allowing a civil society to grow involves devolving freedom so that individuals may speak, associate and engage in rigorous debate, the last thing any politician should be doing is to preempt that discussion by saying they are "unconvinced."

Clearly there are problems in the way public discourse takes place (or doesn't) and I thought it would be a good way to start this column by looking at what some of these are.


Generally speaking, two recurring problems plague the way in which discussion on gay rights takes place. The first is simple intolerance. Debate cannot take place if the only argument the opponents of gay rights have is that "society is not ready." Let's admit it: the majority will never be ready to change as long as they continue to hold on to irrational stereotypes. No amount of discussion is going to change their mind. The only way to disprove those stereotypes is to actually make them confront the reality that their paranoia is based on false premises. The dominant whites would never have accepted interracial marriages or integrated public spaces were it not for the United States Supreme Court handing down decisions saying that such practices were not legal.

Hopefully, San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom's uber-heroism will make opponents of gay marriage see that homosexuals loving each other do not cause heterosexual marriages to break up. And that stable homosexual relationships don't lead to bestiality, pedophilia, necrophilia and space missions going bad.

Perhaps more frustrating, though, is the sheer intellectual dishonesty that pervades discussion. Take for instance Assistant Professor Tan Seow Hon's response to my article, "Oral Sex Law Demeans the Individual" (The Straits Times commentary, Nov 11, 2003). She spent considerable effort explaining (wrongly) the philosophies of several legal scholars while completely leaving unanswered my central argument that private choices should remain outside the ambit of the law. Often, arguments about "tradition" are also couched in secular terms when, in truth, they are a disguise for religious ideology. It's not that religious tradition is not an important consideration, but if are to have an open discussion, the least we can do is to be honest. To abuse our intellect in an attempt to obfuscate is a great disservice to the discourse of civil rights and is downright insulting to its participants.

The way in which public discussion takes place, however, is only half the problem. The other half is who takes part in it.

The thing that worries me is that - more often than not - arguments advocating GLBT rights seem to come only from the community itself. But that makes it much easier to demonise the argument: "You're gay - of course you would ask for rights." It makes it easier when it's only the PLU who's doing anything because you can paint them as a renegade, no-good, emotive bunch.


No civil rights movement has ever succeeded without the help of those outside the discriminated class. It is much more powerful when a heterosexual says that he believes in according respect and dignity to gays. This explains part of why Newsom's initiative is that much more poignant.

It says a lot about any majority that prefers to keep silent than to try and involve themselves in the fight. How the state treats an individual should be of concern to all of us. When the state abuses its power against the weak, it should matter to all of us.

History has taught us that a government who believes its people to be pliant will soon extend its power against anyone who dissents. In the antebellum period in the United States, not only were blacks enslaved, but even whites had their freedoms taken away: no one could speak, no one could associate. For long periods, the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People (NAACP) had to fight to keep their membership list secret because even the whites themselves were afraid of reprisal.

Singaporeans complain everyday that the government is not listening to them. You know why? Because the government has no interest in being interested unless you are. If the government thinks it can get away with superficial improvements it will do just that. What is the connection between this and minority rights? Well, a failure to deal with any issue is a manifestation of the government's underlying chronic unwillingness to cede autonomy to individuals and to respect the intelligence of society.

But it's also a question of how important you see yourself as being. If you believe that you're an individual who thinks, reflects and formulates positions, you would want the government to recognise your right to conscientious belief. People who say rights don't matter imply that they don't matter.

Those who think that this is just about gay people getting it on with each other totally misconceive what is at stake. It is about the state regulating who you can form intimate relations with, and how you express yourself in those relationships.

The good fight has yet to be won, and in some senses, it has yet to start. When it does, we should all approach it with open and honest minds.

Often labeled a left-winger, Paul Tan looks forward to a career that involves, at various stages, litigating constitutional and criminal cases, teaching, politics and being a restaurateur. He can be reached at tanpaul@hotmail.com.

Singapore

Reader's Comments

Comment #1 was deleted by its author
Comment #2 was deleted by its author
3. 2006-04-28 18:22  
Dear Alvin

I've been seeing this cute guy for about 3 weeks. He's good looking, has abs you can do your laundry off, and makes chicken soup for his mother once a week. Not only does he have a stable job and a convertible, he doesn't smoke, doesn't snore, and best of all, knows how to use his god-given gifts like a pro.

Now comes my problem. I found out that he is planning to vote for the PAP in the upcoming General Elections. Come on - what's that about? This is like having a Log Cabin Republican for a boyfriend! How can any self-respecting gay man even contemplate voting for a government that doesn't treat us like equal citizens? It's ok for us to work for them (the civil service), but not ok for us to enjoy ourselves (and have a party?).

So what should I do?

I was brought up by my wonderful parents to understand that I should never be made to feel like a second class citizen. They taught me to hold my head up high and stand up to any bullies (whether in the school yard or in life). Yet, this "Prince Charming" is displaying all the signs of someone who has his head shoved deep in sand. I would even go so far as to say he's a masochistic self-loathing gay man with internalised homophobia.

We're not talking to each other anymore...even though we still meet up for quickies. But the sex is soul-less and empty. Must I now add "political affiliation" to my list of pre-requisites in a man?

Help me!
4. 2006-04-28 18:31  
Playboy, see... no one is perfect
5. 2006-04-28 21:22  
Dear Playboy.

If you really like him and even thinking of loving him. Does it matter who he give his vote to?
Comment #6 was deleted by its author
Comment #7 was deleted by its author
8. 2006-04-29 07:02  
http://denihilonihil.blogspot.com/2005/11/im-gonna-buy-gun-and-start-war.html

a young reader of fridae's advice column.
9. 2006-04-29 23:10  
Playboy,

I suggest you put politics in the backseat, and kiss and make up(out) with him.

Something as ridiculous as politics ISN'T WORTH throwing away the love of your life.

I remember a saying from a movie "You love someone not despite their flaws, but quite often because of their flaws."
10. 2006-04-30 10:20  
Be sex positive. . .play it safe. . .and just enjoy. . .no discrimination necessary in matters of the heart and loins!
11. 2006-04-30 10:24  
Hey Playboy

More boys to play with out there. . .

politics. . .way of life. . .one's belief. . .important to dig the whole package . . .otherwise become kinda disjointed. . . and as you call it 'empty' sex (which is ok but kinda like fast food) . . .not quite fulfilling. . .

happy fishing
12. 2006-05-01 10:27  
Hey Playboy,

From what you wrote, this guy is a dream come true. From a very experienced guy like me

1. Make sure the 1st rule of Pure top and btm exists and you like your roles.

2. Communication is very important when you are talking about a good relationship. Make sure you guys try to put yourselve in each other's shoes. Agree to disagree will avoid alot of pains and bring the relationship to the next height.

Most important, being gay doesn't mean he need to appear gay or be a gay activist. I am gay, go to gym, clubs and sex etc. But I don't wear a T-Shirt shouting "Hey I am Gay". I am not a merchandise and no need to advertise. My bearing already attract many and makes the guy I am with proud.

I have Democrats and Republican gay partners in the US and they have been together for 25 years. They should be role models for all of us.
13. 2006-05-02 12:05  
Dear Alvin,


i'm new to here about a week and i 'm very exciting for met a Bi_women to be friends and sex action with, could you introduce someone who are nice and charming interested find a girlfriend ?
my ID Yvonne31

Best
Yvonne
14. 2006-05-02 20:40  
Bottomline: Safer Sex Always!!
15. 2006-05-02 20:40  
What if both partners are negative and in a monogamy relationship is barebacking safe?
Comment #16 was deleted by its author
17. 2006-05-02 21:29  
Yes! Whether boy friend(s) or casual partners, safe sex is a definite must! No doubt about it.
18. 2006-05-02 22:09  
This is a very good article.
19. 2006-05-02 22:44  
Barebacking puts u in the risk of contracting not only HIV, but other STIs as well, such as chlamydia, syphillis, herpes etc... Even for manogamous couples, u never know how "faithful" your other half has been! Not to mention getting infected by other bacteria found in the rectum such as streptococcus group B, or getting a urinary tract infection caused by other bacterium in the rectum! Eeeww!
20. 2006-05-03 00:45  
Why are we still promoting HIV awareness thro safe sex when we shd hv a campaign to END AIDS ONCE AND FOR ALL. I went to a club recently and 3 guys soliciting donation for AIDS, u give money and they give condom and ribbon. Is that awareness or just telling to go n hv "fun"!

It ain't difficult to know ur sex partner HIV status. Produce the slip that comes wt the blood test that u suppose to take every 3 mths.

It is our moral obligation to tell our sex partner whether u know the status or not and let him made the choice.
21. 2006-05-03 01:20  
"Produce the slip that comes wt the blood test that u suppose to take every 3 mths." What about the window period?

And how do you suggest we end AIDS once and for all?
22. 2006-05-03 01:24  
More bottom than the bottom line:

SEX IS NEVER SAFE!!!
23. 2006-05-03 01:34  
Barebacking is definitely nice but contracting other STIs could be daunting and painful and the person would not be in the right state to have sex for a while. Even in a monogamy relationship, the cause of contracting STI may well come from personal hygiene not to mention how faithful and unfaithful either party is. Why risk it when a rubber could do the protection job. Also, sleeping with one person equivalent to sleeping with all the person's partners as well. Definitely if you were to draw out the tree, it is bigger than a family tree ;-) for most gay men.
24. 2006-05-03 01:56  
I think noting is safe , ,but we should keep one on one , relathionship , as partners


And follow our old Asian traditions for love and sex , and not for fun then you will always safe of infertions
25. 2006-05-03 07:59  
Good Article ... though many a times, when u r caught in the "heat of emotion and passion" ... u just want to get it on ... in the toilet, in the saunas, in the bedroom ... anywhere and everywhere 2 gay men can get together, sex is involved. More so ... the 2 men (or sometimes more ... in cases of orgies) involved in the sex act often feel that there is a need to be responsible and do "the right thing" ... by wearing a condom. However, some are risk takers and some prefer to be au naturel ... so what happens ... i suppose it all boils down to being comfortable with your own being and self as well as the person having sex with u ... giving out condoms and a red ribbon is blatantly saying "here u go ... enjoy" but have u ever had any encounters when such outreach people insist u put it on / start a propaganda when passing the condoms to u? if there are no insistence ... it just goes wasted. so be mature, think about your acts ... more importantly ... be vulnerable ...
Comment #26 was deleted by its author
27. 2006-05-03 08:13  
The article is about safe sex messages falling on DEAF ears. So propound all U want, it's easier said than done. I've come across many so called safe partners who will cheat an unsafe with assurances like, "Normally I do safe but with U..."..go figure.

The problem with relationship is trust which is transient when one gets infected. Unless U start a relationship with safe sex at the onset all the time regardless, most will be offended to introduce rubber somewhere into the relationship. See how many couples U know that have safe fun. Most dun. So Houston, we have a problem.

This sounds harsh but given the hardcore jaded nature of promiscuity itself, guess it may seem the only way the safe sex message can be hammered into the consciousness of players is when one gets infected with STI and/or HIV the old fashioned way, that is, U earn it! Then again, like the article says, unsafe is still prevalent even after being infected. So it sure looks like it's more a problem of reckless values more than just practices. No one can force U unless u agree to it. So say NO - Can U?
28. 2006-05-03 11:03  
I know of 1 strong +ve/-ve couple where the active partner (-ve) had only 1 bareback exposure with the infected partner before testings reveal the infection together with reactions to syphilis and warts on the passive partner. They had based on trust as steads before they took the tests. The infected partner has no idea when/who/how he got infected. The active partner now tests for HIV every month now as requested by the infected partner and the relationship after 5 months is still going strong. They survive the relationship based on love and understanding.

Bottomline: Don't risk it regardless how close your partner is. Trust is now a cliche, overly used and wrongly practised. Take good care everyone.
29. 2006-05-03 12:57  
gymgamkl, let's get the fact straight. The volunteers handed out the condoms after you've made a donation to the aids cause. You are confused with the message they are trying to send out. You think that they are trying to ask you to have fun rather then raise the awareness of AIDS. I think you've got most of it- know about HIV, have fun if you WANT, use a condom if you do.

Be informed that handing out condoms is a very effective and real way of reminding you to use it and putting one in your hand, puts that decision to use it or not squarely in your hand.

Often indecisive people have sabotage the effectiveness of condom campaigns by confusing the issues. Let's get this straight, when you get a condom (FOC or not) you can choose to use it or not. Period.
30. 2006-05-03 13:34  
Well..certainly prevention is better than cure. You have crafted yourself so far to be a better person each day. It would be a tragic loss if you blew out the effort that you have built all these years by contracting HIV + . Think it over babe ...
31. 2006-05-03 17:04  
Hey people,

I think we gotta stop condemning HIV positive people as people who are going to die soon, and thinking of HIV as a death sentence. It is not. HIV Positive people can live long and productive lives...

From a review of the 45th Annual ICAAC in 2005

"As we enter the third era of highly active antiretroviral therapy (HAART), the rules of the game have changed. We know that suppression of HIV is possible in the vast majority of patients with a wide variety of regimens. Data now show that suppression can be maintained for 7 years or more (the period during which such therapy has been available), and some researchers project that this will translate into a restoration of an HIV-infected person's lifespan to that of age-matched HIV seronegative individuals."

Whilst many AIDS activists may not like the idea of too many people thinking of HIV/AIDS as a manageable chronic disease, thankfully, this is now fact. People have essentially stopped dying from AIDS if they have access to medication.

Of course this is no reason to be reckless. Therapy is expensive, the stigma is stifling, and side effects are plentiful. So being HIV positive is no walk in the park. But it is no longer a death sentence! All the more we should consider treating those who are HIV+ with respect and compassion. Cos there are more and more HIV+ people living around us...
32. 2006-05-03 18:56  
Risky behaviours are just ice-berg tips of something deeper beneath. Some of the underlining explanations are due to values, education, motives, vulnerability, habits, etc.

Motives
- revenge : You Bastard!
- equality : let's all be in the same boat

Education
- lack of sex education
- will be sad if the victim is a teenager

Vulnerability
- guys with low IQ
- guys who are vulnerable, e.g. deaf, mute
- guys with unsound mind
- guys who are minors or younger

Drugs/Alcohol
- even the most educated or intelligent guy will lose his sense of judgement

Care-less attitude
- risk taker
- bottom is riskier than top?
- not easy for me to be infected?

Habits
- die hard
- enjoyment comes first

Outlook of gaylife
- pessimism : I always think gays dont wish to live longer life because most of them think that there are no golden years for gays; so why care to live longer and it doesnt matter if I have HIV or other illness because I dont want to live longer
- there is very few role models of gays, especially gay couples.
- try putting your age as 40 and see for yourself the response from the chatline!

Well, these are real issues which cannot be tackled ethically or legally in isolation from the psychosocial settings.

33. 2006-05-03 21:33  
cool
34. 2006-05-03 23:36  
Choi chi sum such a ignorant idiot... I feel ashame with the same surname, who knows what the world going to endup with these conservative creatures around us.
35. 2006-05-04 01:30  
the russian thing is very hard to swallow (hehe... swallow). are they still practicing communism? I'm sorry, Im so hooked in my little world, maybe they are too. But whatever the reason, nothing is excusable when it comes to disrespect. well, at least that is what the CHURCH taught me in sunday school. funnyL int the history of mankind, they have never - NEVER - been consistent. and this is not an exception.
36. 2006-05-04 06:14  
One important aspect that is missing in this discussion is Evaluation. Given any message -- be it harm reduction or absolute safe sex or abstinance, etc. -- what are their impact on the target audience? Are there any studies on rate of condom use, etc., before and after any particular campaign? Without good scientific data to measure the effectiveness of an intervention, we will always be stuck at the level of: we should do this, no we should do that. Witness the stand still between MOH's insistent on ABC and the MSM population view that this does not work. Both speak without backing from scientific data and are unlikely to be able to convince each other.

There are now substantial literature from the public health field on the effectiveness of various intervention to induce behavioural changes. It deals not just with What the messages are, but also on Who, How, Where, When of effective delivery. One place to start is the website http://www.effectiveinterventions.org

Dr Goldstone is technically correct that no harm reduction practices are 100% fail safe. So is the religious right's point that condom are not 100% fail safe neither.

But harm reduction is not about being 100% fail safe. It is about reducing risk. Sex is more complex than seat belt. There is a considerable population who will not use or are too inconsistent with condom. Taking an absolutist position means being unable to tackle the problem of reducing HIV transmission among this population.
37. 2006-05-04 09:16  
why would god be with people who harm others in his name?

gah. stupid people.
38. 2006-05-04 09:44  
If the programme should be stopped for it promotes homosexuality, then i think those programme promoting christianity in HK should be stopped.

I have doubts if the programme (both the radio programme and the christian programme) have any effect on the society. If I not a christian, I will not turn to be a christian solely by watching the programme. Likewise, no one can become a homosexual by listening to the radio programme.

Why cant the Society for Truth and Light (they indeed give truth and light to the society?) just accept different voices and views in the society?
39. 2006-05-04 13:49  
"The Center" in Long Beach, California consistently advises that oral/genital sex without a condom is "safe", i.e., the risk is astronomically low provided one has no canker sores, burns, bites, etc. in the mouth.
40. 2006-05-04 14:25  
"Unless your penis has since withered and dropped off, and you have sprouted breasts and developed a working vagina, you are technically not a lesbian. So you can breathe easier now."
You read my mind aswell as made my chuckle. Not sure if you can relate to this Kaman but my best friend happens to be female ( suprise, suprise). I miss her everytime she goes off to have sex with her fuckbuddy and when shes hanging out with him. Sometimes i feel so insecure that i think she's going to run away with him and no longer be my best friend (sounds so gay, and yes i do have a great boyfriend).
I've known her longer than my boyfriend and i feel like i can communicate more with her than my boyfriend. I think what we are feeling is a strong emotional connection with our friends but we can never feel that sexual attraction towards them. We are the needy gay men that has to have their fag hag next to them.
41. 2006-05-04 22:17  
Alvin, I like your witty comments! You're a keeper!

AJ
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43. 2006-05-04 23:09  
WONDERFUL! is all I can say..
44. 2006-05-04 23:20  
Phuket is a beautiful place. And I hope all our gay friends will be good guests and polite to local people. This is one way we build public support for gay social and economic power.

People at the Splash/Squirt in Bangkok were all very nice and good reputation with Sheraton Hotel.
Let's keep up the good record and have fun too!

Michaelasia
45. 2006-05-04 23:55  
Thailand a country of smile and warmth.

If you have been missing Nation, do not make this your sixth. Cheers~

Goers
46. 2006-05-05 00:08  
great schedule! Can't wait to see Kate again!!!
Will be staying longer this time!!!
47. 2006-05-05 00:45  
Dont go to parties normally but had a nice time last year...hope to be there this year with my special guy...it'll be much better i think.

By the way guys...could there be more variety in terms of venues where the parties take place. One ballroom over and over again without much change is a little boring....but i suppose you guys at Fridae know that already.

See ya
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50. 2006-05-05 04:56  
last year fridae overhyped, overcharged and badly organised - the reality was a big disappointment compared to previous years
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52. 2006-05-05 07:24  
It would be really great if one year the organisers actually thought a little bit more about the music. After just getting back from Maydaze in KL where the music was terrible I'm not looking forward to a repeat performance of tribal crap. Save all that mind-numbingly repeative beat must be out of your head on drugs to enjoy rubbish for the straight clubs. Give us something that we can actually dance to instead!. DJ's take note, you are becoming boring.
53. 2006-05-05 07:54  
I couldn't think of anyone better to finish off the long weekend. If there is anyone out there who is gonna keep everyone on their feet dancing after 72 hours of love, it's Kate Monroe. She is truly queen of the dancefloor!
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55. 2006-05-05 09:09  
To the people in Singapore. We want our parties. We want HIV to be properly addressed by the government. May 6th is your chance to make a difference, you have a choice.
56. 2006-05-05 12:01  
last year the "nation" party is at the date of my birthday. but i cant go there to join the party...sad. but hope this year i can go to join in this party,this is my 1st time....
57. 2006-05-05 16:11  
I agree with aznmailpwr and MarkAH but Alvin's stories are getting less and less.

Can we have more? They make us smile and LOL.
58. 2006-05-05 16:17  
is fridae also organising a party in san franciso but is not on fridae website?

http://www.circuitpartyinsanity.com
59. 2006-05-05 18:51  
Top guys: Do you always pull out your cock completely from the ass and check if the tip of the condom has burst after a few minutes of rough penetration?

Bottom guys: Do you know that you can never feel the breaking of your top's condom while he is entering you?

And gentlemen, what safe sex is there, if a condom is wrapping the body of the top's cock instead of its mushroom head from which pre-cum and cum ooze out?

Let's talk about safe sex through the use of condoms only when we have understood the material nature of this sheath.
60. 2006-05-06 08:32  
i think u can actually feel the condom bursting when its in u ... there is a "pop" sound ... and sometimes during rough sex, even if its just rough play outside the hole ... the condom has broken before ... so is it really safe to use a condom ??? unless u double it up!
61. 2006-05-06 10:24  
We want our party here in Singapore....do something
62. 2006-05-06 10:54  
In response to katsung's post, there are many different things that could have happened with that condom. The most common reason the condom may have teared is because of the use of an oil-based lubricant like cooking oil, vaseline, or baby lotion on the condom which can cause it to easily tear in a matter of a few strokes. A water based lubricant should be used instead like KY jelly or Astroglide. Secondly, make sure you use a reliable brand of condom which meets international standards like durex, okomoto, or trojan. I am not sure about the "popping" sound but I do know the condom is designed to break "dramatically" if there is anything wrong with it so that the user knows he should put on a new condom. Finally, condom use should never be doubled because it increases the chance of the condom slipping off and the chance of condom tearing because of the friction between the two condoms. Again, the best thing to do is to use a reliable brand of condom, with a WATER-based lubricant, and only one condom each time. I hope this answers your question.
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78. 2006-05-08 05:39  
The main people who object are adherents of a religion that was brought to these shores by zealous imperialists; a significant number of its asian followers expouse values which are contrary to core asian values of temperance, acceptance and personal responsibility in the context of communal well being. Maybe their anger comes from hating their asian traditions. Personally, religions, like farts, should be done in private, and not passed out in society.
79. 2006-05-08 07:59  
Thanks guys for that insight ... i could have sworn ... i could hear the "pop" sound ... but nonetheless ... better be safe than sorry. The other thing i noticed ... when having sex ... 1 to 1 or during orgies ... the guys fucking are usually high on E, V, and poppers and chem ... what have u ... and i feel such eroticism enhancement applications should be minimised ... i have noticed that most guys who have used all these during intercourse cannot sustain an erection for more that 10 thrusts into the hole of the guy they are fucking. so what's the point then ... not to sound to judgmental ... these drugs may prove to be some sort of HIV prevention innovations ... since u cannot sustain an erection ... no bodily fluid is produced ... i may be wrong ... but what's the point of taking such drugs when it clouds the brain in your head ... and blocks the blood heading down to your "brain" down there ... COMMENTS PLEASE!
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83. 2006-05-09 15:12  
To katsung, I will comment on the correlation between drugs/alcohol and STI/HIV. Whether drugs/alchohol improves the sexual acts or not, I am more concerned of the effects of impairment of judgment on the brains causing sexual acts to be unsafe. If you know of people who are infected with STIs or HIV, chances are they have tried party drugs or are drunk on several occasions, with some related to orgies. If one cannot control drug or alcohol problem, then safe sex is at risk even if one knows A-Z of safety.

The use of drugs/alcohol with/for sex is a time bomb for potential STIs and HIV.
84. 2006-05-15 08:35  
Hi last year Nation party was good but the lack of real security was dissapointing, the movie screen in the dance area was pushed over by some one who was off their head. ther was a lack of medical persons or identified medical persons on the floor and some people wre overheating from ??
the airconditioning was poor and the smoke machine made it worse. safety first please and identified medical and security persons for all to see in case of need. will be there this year
85. 2006-05-15 16:07  
well im going this year for the first time... ive heard alot about the party and my friends has been going almost every year. reading about the comments here about people's expirience kinda scares me. dont get me wrong i am a prty person but when it comes to a big event like this we all do need some sort of assurance of safety althou we are travelling with friends. cant wait to go tho!
86. 2006-05-16 11:38  
I'm pretty sure there was a medical team (doctors and nurses) 24/7 that provided not only emergency care, but also free HIV and STD testing at the medical suite. Were we at the same party?
87. 2009-04-29 01:03  
"deep sea diving apparatus" "trisexual" ur brilliant Alvin - Bravo!

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