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8 Apr 2011

Positive Voices: Joseph Bugo

Positive Voices is an ongoing series featuring Asian LGBT individuals who are HIV-positive and are living positively.

To Joseph Bugo who has been living with HIV over 20 years, mental wellness is the most crucial factor that has helped him and what he thinks will give others the hope and strength to live. He is also an advocate of real life and in person sharing of experiences to reinforce the message to other PLHIV (people living with HIV) that one is not alone. 

So strong is his belief that he wrote to Fridae to offer to share his personal experiences having tested positive in 1990 when he was just 24. 

Born and raised in Hong Kong until he was 21 years old, he now lives in New York City although he has been travelling to Hong Kong twice a year in the last four years to visit his family and volunteer his time attending support groups organised by various HIV organisations. 

He tells Fridae that he has been the top seller in the menswear department in the company where he has worked for the past 12 years. “At work, everyone knows about my status and my coworkers treat me like any working professional with respect.” 

But it wasn’t so easy at the beginning.

“The mind controls the body,” he told Fridae of his personal experiences. 

“I truly know what emotional pain feels like and how it can bring havoc to one's health. I had my fair share of suffering depression and anxiety in the past and now the last three years I learned how to cope, did a lot of reading believing now a healthy mind is so important part of treatment and well being for anyone living a lifelong manageable condition.”

Joseph is scheduled to attend the Red Mission GaP Party (Gay Pride Party) on April 30 at Hullett House (Heritage 1881, No. 2A Canton Rd, Tsim Sha Tsui, Kowloon) and support group sessions mainly with MSM PLHIV but also combined sessions with women and heterosexual participants. For more details, please contact the Hong Kong AIDS Foundation.

æ: Since testing positive, did you share the news of your initial positive test result with someone?

Photos courtesy of Joseph Bugo

Joseph: Yes. In 1990, I had a few friends who had either AIDS or living with the virus. When I got my results back from the clinic that afternoon, I froze, numbed, speechless.

The first thing came to my mind was a close friend who lived close by my area and I went straight to his apartment to let him know the bad news. He was very sad. I firmly asked him what I really need to do now in order to keep myself healthy. I needed some directions where and how to find info and resources to understand the virus. It was not easy to deal with my results during the dark times in the 90's, almost everyone I knew were sick or dying. It was also the time before protease inhibitors came out as a promising treatment.

æ: Why did you choose to tell this person? 

Joseph: I chose this person because he was an AIDS activist for many years, very knowledgeable and has been living with AIDS for many years. Sorry to tell you he passed away few years later moving back home with his family. He provided me some info where to go like attending support groups at the community centre and recommended me to read a few books about HIV. At that time, there were limited resources to find on the Internet.

I also told the news to my best friend. He was sad and shocked. We are still best, best friends today and he is so proud of me what I went through all these years being so positive minded. When I am down, he has always been there for me to lift up my spirit back up. I thank him for that.

However I decided not to tell my parents and family until eight years later. The main reason was the last thing I needed from someone to be over worry about me. That would make me feel more uncomfortable and a lot of pressure on me.

I only decided to tell my parents after I was on anti-viral medication for two years, to ensure them nothing to worry, as I have been living with the virus over eight years and doing well so far. All I asked from them was to be there for me, accept me, love me and continue to support my strength to live and fight this manageable condition.

æ: Has your HIV status changed your sex life significantly? If so, how?

Joseph: With my HIV status, it did change my sex practices significantly. I worry about infecting others even with safe sex condom use. Before I was tested positive, I did practice safe sex and on few occasions, unsafe sex. I was that type of person. Since knowing my status and aware that STDs is on the rise, the last thing I need is to infect my body with another bug to put more harm to my immune system.

My sex practices now are definitely, no doubt condom use for anal intercourse. However, I do not engage much in intercourse. I don’t give up my booty that easy. The boys have to earn it! I am much more selective on choosing who to have sex with. My favourite sex approach is safer sex: oral sex, body contact, massaging each other, hugging, a bit of dirty fun talking, with a smile.

æ: Has your approach to love and relationships changed since you found out you were HIV-positive? Why? 

The Red Mission GaP Party (Gay Pride Party) is slated to be held on April 30 at Hullett House (Heritage 1881, No. 2A Canton Rd, Tsim Sha Tsui, Kowloon).

Joseph: Yes for many years, I was not ready to commit in a relationship, mainly disclosure was never an easy thing to do and afraid of rejection. Slowly I realised it was me and what was in my head to fear the worst. I do have anxiety issues to deal with all those years.

Fast forward, I am in a five-year relationship, going strong, there for each other both good and hard times. We adopted two rescued dogs four years ago whom we consider to be our kids; one boy and one girl. One big happy family. By the way, my partner is HIV-negative.

æ: How do you decide whether to tell someone your HIV status?

Joseph: It all depends on what is the purpose and intentions to disclose to him or her. It could be you want them to know your real self and still accept you as a dear friend or to educate them that such person like me exist. Acceptance, honesty are always my main virtues.

æ: What is one myth about living with HIV that you’ve now realised was incorrect?

Joseph: Not one myth. There are so many myths.

Living with HIV does not mean you will or eventually developed AIDS. It is no longer a deadly disease. With many promising medications available now, living with HIV to me is just like any other manageable health conditions, like diabetes, cardiovascular heart problems, etc. We need to remind us and the public that the virus does not kill you; it's the infections that kill you that make you weak and sick. There is no life cap what most people think living with HIV is the most 10 years. I am living with the virus over 20 years and still going strong.

æ: Tell us about one of your most memorable disclosure stories (friends, family, colleagues/bosses, doctors, partner or dates, etc).

Joseph: My best moment on disclosure definitely is with my current partner. I told him right on the beginning of our second date. He accepted me regardless of my status. I wasted no time. Why fear? Not my loss! Let me be nice, hahaha.

There were many memorable honest moments. Every time when I have the opportunity to disclose my status, say my family members, co-workers, my managers, my friend’s friends, I feel more and more comfortable about whom I am. I have nothing to be ashamed of myself and I refuse to be a victim in the society.

æ: Has your relationship with your family and friends changed or evolved after you found out you are HIV-positive? If so, how?

Joseph: I would say my family and friends, for all those years, know how capable I am taking care of myself, especially my friends who believe so much in me that I am also helping their friends who are also HIV positive and share our experiences.

We evolved. I bonded with my family like they were my best friends and my best friends like we are family.

æ: Have you started Anti-Retroviral treatment (ART)?

Joseph: Yes. I tested positive in 1990 and started my Anti-Retroviral medication in 1997. My current cocktail treatment is working wonderful. I am on Isentress, Intelence and Truvada for over two years now. My viral load is undetectable and my CD4 count went up to 550 from 200 two years ago. I am blessed.

Two and a half years ago, through the Genotype test, I found out I developed resistance to the current Anti-Retroviral medication I was taking and had to switch to three new medications.

Within a month, I experienced a major side effect on the new medications. My blood glucose level went so high within a month; I lost 30 pounds. I was devastated; physically I looked very weak and sick. Along with my anxiety and depression, on a few occasions I had suicide thoughts. The worst feeling I ever felt in my entire life. The hardest part I felt during that time was I had to stop those three medications and to start another three new medications immediately. I was very scared. Do I have a choice? In my mind I don't think I am going to make it. I told myself what the hell, give it a shot, I have nothing to lose. I already lost 30 pounds.

Now, three years later. I am alive and so well. I believe there is a god or a guardian angel, along with a bit of luck, truly gave me a second chance to live.

Looking back now, I am glad I had the opportunity to go through physical and emotional suffering to know what pain is and truly knows how and what other people have to go through living with HIV. If I have not gone through that process, I would not be here so dedicated to help others. Hope is so important in our life to move forward. I also learned to appreciate everything and everyone around us and never take things for granted. I believe I evolved and learning is a never ending process to be a better person. I am blessed and fortunate I am doing very well now, physically, mentally, spiritually best I ever felt in my entire life.

æ: What challenges, if any, have you found in pursuing a career and living with HIV?

Joseph: To be honest, there were no challenges in pursuing a career. I never would use my health or condition as an excuse to skip work or take a day off. I think that is bad karma.

æ: Have you ever experienced discrimination on the basis of your HIV status from government agencies (eg. police, health workers, schools, employment officials, immigration agencies) or other areas (employers, businesses, clubs, etc). If so, please tell us what happened.

Joseph: I am quite aware about government and work policies through readings and know my rights. I never experienced harsh or inappropriate discrimination in any way .But if anyone tries and mess with me, there will be consequences.

æ: Can you share one humorous or odd thing about your life with HIV?

Joseph: I disclosed my status to many people over many years. Their first reaction was that I did not look like what they would think someone living with the virus to be so healthy and they could not tell from the way I look and the way how I carry or conduct myself. They asked questions and through disclosure, I gave them accurate information and better understanding more about the virus.

When they asked me questions about sex, my favourite quote, “Remember, sex does not always have to be intercourse.

æ: What needs to happen in order for people living with HIV to feel more comfortable about telling people about their status?

Joseph: There are so many ways, approaches to be comfortable to disclose with the right situation in the right time at the right place. It is also how you like to say it with a little bit of your thought with an appropriate delivery of speech.

For me, be healthy physically, strong mentally to face any rejections, believe spiritually your honesty. Those are my beliefs to give me the confidence, comfort level when I have a chance to disclose my status, with a smile. See their reactions; take it from there, with the intentions either to help them a better understanding about HIV and awareness that such person exist like me within the community.

Luckily, from my past experience, I could only recall two rejections. They walked away or simply ignored me. I did not feel bad, guilt or angry about the other person. In my mind, wish them best of luck and hope they would learn from this as an experience.

æ: Stigma and discrimination against people living with HIV is often quite challenging for everyone. What is one simple thing that people could do to encourage more acceptance in the community?

Joseph: The stigma and discrimination still exist even within the gay community where many are not comfortable to come out.

Myself and other long-term non-progressors or long term survivors; we have to be better role models for the society and to others PLHIV. It has to come from us first, in order to have more acceptance from the community. Then eventually fewer stigmas from our community to the rest of the society. It is a domino effect from my point of vision.

We cannot blame the public for their ignorance. More so, there is still a lot of work ahead of us from PLHIV, activists, government and other organisations. We have to re-think, re-inform, re-educate the module of approach to lower the increasing infection rate.

æ: What is one thing that you want to do in the future to help the LGBT or PLHIV community?

Joseph: May I list more than one thing?

1st and foremost: Emotional support to all PLHIV and others affected by the epidemic. Mental wellness is so crucial to give everyone the hope and strength to live.

2nd: Share our living experience, with a real face and body that we do exist as a person living and look like anyone else you might see on the streets and on the subway platform. It reinforces a strong encouragement to other PLHIV that you are not alone.

3rd: Introduce a program for PLHIV, have awareness and be part of social responsibility and give back to our community. It has to take a HIV positive person to infect a HIV negative person.

4th: The importance and benefits of early testing and safer sex practice, not just safe sex in the LGBT community. Early testing certainly helps those infected with HIV to live much longer and to live and lead a healthier quality life. Those messages should expand to a wider audience through public statements like magazines advertisements or interviews, public speaking or government funded public messages on bus stops or subway.

5th: Demonstrative 2-3 minute videos depicting various sex situations and scenarios like on line hook-ups, sex in public places, how to negotiate safe and safer sex practices in the heat of passion. 

6th: Provide statistical information on HIV and STD increasing infection rates over the last 6 years to our community and re-address the importance of condom use. 

æ: What motivates and inspires you for the future? 

Joseph: To continue and believe my efforts, I am making other people’s lives better and more and more people like me have the courage to come out and give back to the community. I cannot do this alone. It’s a collective effort.

Disclaimer: This article is intended for informational and educational purposes only and is not engaged in rendering medical advice or professional services. The information provided should not be used for diagnosing or treating a health problem or a disease. It is not a substitute for professional care. If you have or suspect you may have a health problem, consult your health care provider.

If you are HIV-positive and living in Asia, and want to share your story, please write to editor@fridae.com.

Look out for PositiveVoices.Net, a soon-to-be-launched social networking site for HIV-positive gay men and transgender people living in Asia built around their shared experience of living with HIV.

Reader's Comments

1. 2011-04-08 21:20  
Joseph, thankyou so much for sharing your story and such personal aspects/thoughts of your life. I admire your honesty and selflessness and wish you all the best in the future which seems so bright and inspiring.
2. 2011-04-08 21:33  
Thats Joseph for your insight! Mental wellness is very crucial in how we poz people see ourselves. you got that right!

Wish you all the best for your future!
Comment #3 was deleted by its author on 2011-04-08 21:33
4. 2011-04-08 21:55  
thumbs up for you...

wish you all the best
5. 2011-04-08 21:59  
Good luck to u Joseph and to all the good work that u are doing a very good luck,i admire ur strength and courage to face all the challenges so far and in the future ahead
6. 2011-04-08 22:27  
Thank you Joseph for what you have written. There is still light at the end of the tunnel and I hope to see mine eventually.
7. 2011-04-08 23:22  
Keep going, Joseph. The future will be brighter and brighter.
8. 2011-04-08 23:39  
Thanks Joseph for your kind and honest sharing. I am deeply impressed by your cheerful spirit.

I love this quote, which is high essential practiced by all of us:
"Mental wellness is so crucial to give everyone the hope and strength to live."

Thanks Joseph, you are so brilliant and I am proud of you! :)
9. 2011-04-08 23:41  
Hugs to you Joseph. You have all my support and admirations. Thank you for sharing with us on everything and anything else. :)
10. 2011-04-08 23:57  

11. 2011-04-09 00:23  
Dear Joey,

Great interview. Add oil!!!!!!!!!
12. 2011-04-09 00:57  
You are really a strong bravo guy! Thanks for your honest sincere sharing and made us ponder about us in this community ... particularly practising safe sex and monogamous relationship ... I just want to say meeting a partner whom stay side by side with you is really a god gift! We just need to appreciate it! Best wishes to you! - Simon
Comment edited on 2011-04-09 00:58:12
13. 2011-04-09 01:30  
Joey, I m so proud of you! I m sure this article will benefit a lot of people. So see u soon! Love ya! SGC
14. 2011-04-09 02:04  
He is hot...
15. 2011-04-09 02:37  
Thank you so much Joseph for sharing your story with us

It does not cut any corners- it tells it as it is

I know when I say that you are a beacon of inspiration and support to our communities you will only blush....

I am proud to know you


16. 2011-04-09 03:13  
Strong man, strong body, strong mind...hope to all men!
17. 2011-04-09 03:49  
What a moving and honest article and what a man! Thank you so much for sharing your story with us.
18. 2011-04-09 04:43  
As soon as I saw the article, I know that I had to call you and let you know that I love you and glad that we've been friends since the latter '80. Thanks for sharing, and you are such an amazing human being.
Keep doing and being YOU! :-) I am proud to be your friend.
19. 2011-04-09 07:05  
“Remember, sex does not always have to be intercourse."
very well said.

i want to hug you., muah.
20. 2011-04-09 08:19  
thanks Joseph! Big hug!
21. 2011-04-09 08:26  
HIV will never cease to exist until we cease to 'glorify' people who are living with this disease. Yes, support for ppl living with HIV/AIDS is important in the LGBT community but we need to educate our younger generation that it's not 'ok' to live with the condition, even if modern medicine may mean longer life expectancies for HIV/AIDS sufferers!
22. 2011-04-09 08:56  
this is one of the best interviews with a HIV+ man on his life since seroconverting I have read on here actually any where, he's a handsome fella too and exceedingly intellignet and articulate, so yes a positive role model for other guys who find them selves in a similar situation, the thing is though not all HIV+ people are in a socio-economic position to be better educated or are able to access expensive medications and to present such a positive face to the world, the reality is the socio-economic under classes and not so pretty will contine to suffer with not much media attention given to their lives, the 'Gay world' needs to strengthen it's message about HIV prevention and support to all layers of society, and yes include celibacy as a positive health alternative and positive choice, in the absence of a loyal partner I am almost 4yrs celibate now, I have friends who are over a decade and more happily celibate so ~BaNg~ goes the theory all men NEED to have unabandoned unrestrained rampant sex every day and we homosexual males all lead the same 'Gay life style' the truth is we ARN'T all 'skanky queers' and it's OK.. NOT.. to be sexually available to just about every deviant low life on the planet.
Comment edited on 2011-04-09 09:25:34
23. 2011-04-09 09:06  
Hi Jo

I love you!

Be strong and healthy always!!

Stay happy too! Glad you have yur loves one to give you all the support! Please include me too! hehe....

Keep us update whenever you can....I am so proud of you!!


Take care my Joe

Joe here too
24. 2011-04-09 10:18  
Well done. This article is very informative as well as encouraging. It does change my perspective towards HIV.

Life is not always easy. However, I have learnt from Joseph that life does have adversity but it's more about how you handle it and get out of it.

Thank you, Joseph. I wish you all the best in the future.
25. 2011-04-09 10:41  
take care my man
26. 2011-04-09 10:54  
Love the picture of Stanley Park in Vancouver!
27. 2011-04-09 10:55  
A standing ovation for u! Even though Im not living with HIV, I dun think I have a life as meaningful and great as u! Keep it up! U inspired me!
28. 2011-04-09 11:01  
hey man, your story impress me a lot! your struggle along the way is definitely a real model to all the people who's been in dark and trying to find a way out, not necessarily within the community!
29. 2011-04-09 11:45  
Hear hear to Joseph. PLHIV need strong support; the trick is to make sure we in the gay community are giving that support, recognizing that the more we open to this, the more informed everyone becomes, the better choices people can chose to make.

The disease trends are changing and the efforts to both prevent infections and to help those living with infections need to change and develop accordingly; "seanadit" makes so very valid points, particularly when focusing education efforts on people that are not infected but are engaging in unsafe activities, intentionally or not. As he pointed out, not everyone will have the basic intellectual/emotional make-up of Joeseph, nor the socio-economic support systems needed to not only live with HIV but live happily and productively. More needs to be done for education and outreach, particularly in sites like Fridae, Gaydar, Gayromeo, Dudesnude, etc. because they reach an ever larger audience that can then reach those that don't use these sights. I, as a user, have to do my part too. We all do...

30. 2011-04-09 12:35  
what a fighter.
Comment #31 was deleted by its author on 2011-08-13 17:51
32. 2011-04-09 18:50  
A fitting role model for the HIV+, gay or otherwise.
33. 2011-04-09 19:04  
34. 2011-04-09 20:12  
hey joseph,

i want to thank you for inspiring others with your story. your strong will and positive mind set has my utmost respect especially what happened to your 3 years ago. at the low point of your life, you turn weakness into strength.

All the best to you and your loved ones.
35. 2011-04-09 21:37  
very inspiring story, thank you!
36. 2011-04-09 22:52  
Joseph bugo has the profile in fridae?
who knows how to contact with him?
37. 2011-04-09 22:52  
Joseph bugo has the profile in fridae?
who knows how to contact with him?
Comment #38 was deleted by its author on 2015-02-02 13:31
39. 2011-04-10 00:05  
THanks for sharing!
40. 2011-04-10 01:39  
all the best!!! live well....
Comment #41 was deleted by its author on 2015-02-02 13:33
Comment #42 was deleted by its author on 2011-08-13 17:51
Comment #43 was deleted by its author on 2015-02-02 13:33
44. 2011-04-10 14:14  
Josept. Well done. I'm proud of u.
45. 2011-04-10 22:41  
you're the man!!! wish i also have the courage to face it if i am infected... ill surely need to meet you in person... you're one special man... cheers!!!
46. 2011-04-11 00:38  
47. 2011-04-11 00:53  
Dear Shabuya

You seem worried, judging from your comments above. However you are doing the right thing by getting tested for HIV and doing your STI examinations. Caesar's advice to you is practical and I echo that.

Moving on, yes, do go for your 2nd HIV Test at PT Foundation. I know the guys there. They will be able to not only provide free and anonymous HIV screening but counsel you on what the test results mean, and how to move forward, including how to remain negative if you are negative, and where to seek treatment if you are positive. Their counselors will also be able to advise you on where to go should you wish to see a gay friendly STI doctor. You can also call PT Foundation counseling line at 603-4044 5455 Mon-Fri from 7.30pm - 9.30pm.
48. 2011-04-11 13:12  
a real authentic quality guy:)
Comment edited on 2011-04-11 16:09:52
49. 2011-04-11 17:14  
Thanks Joseph for your kind and honest sharing. I am deeply impressed by your cheerful spirit. very brave ,keep up
50. 2011-04-11 17:22  
Two thumbs up :)
51. 2011-04-11 19:05  
aww So touch . Joseph . You are Idol ...
52. 2011-04-12 12:32  
I am amazed to see that so many positive comments. To be honest, I don't really know what to say right now. I sincerely thank you all for taking the time to post your comments, it means a lot to me and most important I know all of you truly care about our community.
Feel free to send me a message to share your thoughts or to assist you and/or someone you know.
53. 2011-04-13 20:49  
HIV infection is never comparable to type 2 diabetes. Diabetes does not spread! Diabetes does not have the taboo and stigma attached to it! Diabetes may still go away if you detect it early and lose like 10% of your weight! Medications for diabetes do not cause side effects like metabolic syndrome and dyslipidemia and lipodystrophy!

And it's not okay to be positive just because it can be treated with HAART!
54. 2011-04-13 22:45  
I think we have to be rational about HIV. We should always adopt the BEST course of action applicable to a given situation. But the situation may be different for different people.

For those who are still HIV-negative, preventing themselves from getting infected WITHOUT compromising their sexual needs is the BEST course of action. If you force yourself not to have any sex just because there's HIV, then I think you are going to extremes. Beside HIV, there are other fatal diseases that you can still catch even if you remain a virgin for life: SARS, MRSA, TB and even dengue fever. Even if you don't catch any of these diseases, you can't live forever. The point is we need to take a reasonable level of precaution but not overdo things. If you are HIV-negative, then practise consistent protected sex. That's a reasonable level of precaution. Even better, vaccinate yourself, if you can afford to, against diseases like Hepatitis B, Hepatitis A (which you may catch by rimming), common flu, and genital wart.

The BEST course of action available to HIV-positive people, however, is different. They can't undo their infection; there is no cure for HIV. So, the BEST course is for them to seek treatment regularly in order to control the viral load. Even though it may mean you have to fork out a few hundred dollars or more a month for the pills and tests, by seeking treatment and maintaining good health, you should be able to continue to work, enjoy your life for the treatment and play like HIV-negative people. Living with HIV doesn't mean you need to forgo the rosy parts of life: travel, clubbing, dining, shopping, movies, etc.. But what it means is that IF you don't seek treatment regularly, you will probably have to sacrifice all these and your precious life.
55. 2011-04-14 10:54  
Thanks for sharing !
56. 2011-04-15 12:21  
salamat (thank you in Tagalog) in sharing with us your experience. i learned a lot in reading this article.
57. 2011-04-15 20:19  
Great mind-opening sharing, Joseph! You gave a great fight to the virus and I m sure you will live till a ripe old age, surpassing those even living without the virus! Anyway, dont forego the hope that the cure for HIV is around the corner! The cure will be found soon!!!
58. 2011-04-15 20:21  
And to Shabuya, stay strong & hopeful ! No human or virus should deny you of the enjoyment your body wants!
59. 2011-04-15 22:20  
Thumbs UP for the great courage.U good looking,handsome and gorgeous.Luv you.
60. 2011-04-15 22:20  
Thumbs UP for the great courage.U good looking,handsome and gorgeous.Luv you.
61. 2011-04-16 03:28  
wowwwww you are very strong men iside and out and also you very hadsome men, i think your partner is very proud of you, i wish to find a men like you.
62. 2011-04-16 03:28  
wowwwww you are very strong men iside and out and also you very hadsome men, i think your partner is very proud of you, i wish to find a men like you.
63. 2011-04-17 18:23  

Gay men got infected through condomless anal sex. I think if we can control our libido, hopefully we can prevent ourselves from getting infected by HIV.
64. 2011-04-19 13:02  
Wow. Thanks for sharing!
65. 2011-04-26 14:35  
I want to say how proud I am to call you my love, my partner and my best friend. You showed me what courage, compassion and generosity you hold in that beating heart of yours. You also showed me and the world and community what it means to have hope and strength. I will always stand beside you to give the support, love and strength you need to fuel your purpose and your belief. I love you and always will.
66. 2011-04-29 10:28  
Very nice interview. Tq to share..
67. 2011-06-03 10:56  
Hi there , why dont s'pore govermant allow malaysian HIV + to continue working there as the medication will be paid by the employee at thier own country.
68. 2011-06-13 21:22  
Very nice interview, good luck to you!

69. 2011-08-12 15:02  
Hello Joseph,

Thanks for sharing your story! I guess it must have taken U a lot of courage to tell Us what U had gone through. I suppose there are a lot of thing I can learn from U! I was not brave like U in certian ways! I had discovered that I'm a HIV+ in Dec last years & I'm now on medical treatments. I had not been working for almost 1 n 1/2 years. It's very expensive for me to purchase my medicine but fortunately I managed to get the Government for help in funding my medicine, other than that, I'm quite stable on my condition. I had put up a lot of courage to share my condition with my older bisexual friends, some of them accept me as what I am & for other who do not, walk away from my life! I'm the younger of 8 in my big family but I do not lives with them for the past 15 years! I had been living with a senior male friends who beginning was my boyfriends, slowly has became just friends & now became my Godfather. We haven't have sex for more than 12 years! We maintain as a father & son relationships & he had been very understanding & supportive towards me even thought I'm now a HIV+, I managed to share my condition with two of my sibling but they are not very supportive. It's does'nt matter to me any more even thought I put up the courage to tell them but inside me, I felt hurt & depressed, I supposed I'm never close to any of my family members except my Godfather. I lives one days at a time but I felt so tired days after days! I don't have many close friends in my life, I felf lonely at times, I have a choice to make, take medicine & carry on living or stop medication & face the suffering. Life for me was so meaningless! I need support, a lot of support & of course a shoulder to cry on! It's very hard for me to move one step at a times! I don't know how long I'm going to lives. I really really feeling tired, physically & mentally tired! Please advice! Uji ( my email: ujilim@gmail.com )
70. 2011-08-25 21:56  
To No.69, I would suggest you to watch "House of Numbers" on youtube when u feel lonely and your Life is so meaningless. Live for yourself and not others.

Best regards.
71. 2011-09-09 23:59  
Thanks a lot Joseph Bugo. I'm so inspired. We're all proud of you. I guess I've learned so much from this.

God Bless :)
72. 2011-09-30 00:28  
Hope to be your friend; ) joseph

you let us learn so much!!!

Comment edited on 2011-09-30 00:37:03
73. 2011-10-04 14:52  
what a touchable story and share! thanks joseph, im just imagine it will be very hard for a person to have that result, but yet you had a mentally strong to coupe that. its really really a good works and efforts to survive till now..i even cant give my thumbs up for you (two thumbs up wasn't enough for your spirit)..*hugs..bravo
74. 2011-11-18 23:57  
Thanks for this article joseph.. Hope i can learning from u,,, Dear,, thanks
75. 2012-05-12 15:34  
76. 2012-05-21 21:04  
Hai Joseph. If You ever remember me - i wrote to you previously. More than a year ago on April,.

I have a bad news. I wish I can get in contact with you again. I have to talk to you.

Thank You

77. 2012-05-21 21:04  
Hai Joseph. If You ever remember me - i wrote to you previously. More than a year ago on April,.

I have a bad news. I wish I can get in contact with you again. I have to talk to you.

Thank You

78. 2012-08-01 16:47  
Hi, I do not know still you are available, perhaps you could try the garlic in RAW, it help more or less to obstruct the virus from spreeding.
79. 2012-08-01 16:48  
Hi, I do not know still you are available, perhaps you could try the garlic in RAW, it help more or less to obstruct the virus from spreeding.
80. 2012-11-04 22:43  
How are today joseph???

Comment #81 was deleted by an administrator on 2012-11-12 12:49
82. 2013-07-05 20:12  
from many experiences, many gays got HIV, followed by other infections, once u got HIV treatment, the infections will go slowly
Comment #83 was deleted by an administrator on 2013-12-03 12:12
84. 2016-09-19 13:51  
i think Joseph did very well to managed his life after infected.. lets hand by hand wish the cure coming out soon.. so everyone can be safe..
85. 2022-03-31 01:50  
I lived with my ex for 8 years nd very early he found he was positive.... fortunately I wasnt, he caught it from someone else.... But honestly it never really entered my head or changed my opinion of him..... he was the same guy I loved before that, so even though it changed our relationship, it never changed how i treated him....

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